365 Days of Outdoor Play – Winter Clothing

One of the toughest logistical aspects for me in tackling this 365 Days of Outdoor Play challenge is finding N the right clothes for winter.  (It’s been an even bigger challenge for me to find affordable, properly fitting, but quality clothing for me, but that’s another story.)  We’ve made it through one of the coldest parts of winter here in Pennsylvania, as well as the chilly autumn, so I think at this point I can say that these winter clothing staples work well for us, overall.  I’m sure things will change over the years and there are already a few switches I’d like to try, but if you’re looking for a place to start, perhaps this post can give you a few ideas.

Many thanks to @t.e.surette from Instagram for her wonderful winter and wet-weather clothing tips!  Several of these items I would never have looked for had it not been for her direction.

IMG_1512

The underlying principle behind nearly all of our winter clothing choices is layering.  This ensures two things: warmth and the ability to utilize all of this clothing for multiple seasons.  When I grew up the rural northwest of Wisconsin, layering was the single most effective way to stay warm (provided your layers weren’t too tight together).  Ideally, I would be able to afford a wool base layer for N to wear, but with how quickly she is growing and our limited budget, it’s not an option right now.  I am, however, very pleased that N has been able to wear all of this clothing in a variety of temperatures and weather conditions.  Though it looks like a lot of gear, it does actually keep her wardrobe smaller and more in line with our minimalist tendencies.

Large Layering Items:

IMG_1515

  • Rainsuit –  This item acts as both a rainsuit during the warmer months and a waterproof snowsuit in the winter months.  We simply add the necessary layers to adjust to the temperature.  I chose Oakiwear’s rainsuit because of it’s adjustable waist, ankles and cuffs, we purchased N’s two sizes too large and to give her plenty of room to grow and make it more cost effective for us.
  • Winter coat – The coat pictured is a durable coat we purchased secondhand.  I can’t say that I have a particular brand to recommend, but I do tend to steer clear from the “puffy feather” looking fashion coats.
  • Columbia fleece jacket – Since the time N joined our family, I have always purchased her a secondhand Columbia fleece jacket.  There’s generally no reason to purchase new (unless you are looking for a particular color and size).  I’ve always found eBay has several listed with plenty of life left in them.
  • Fleece-lined jeans – Again, I’ve always purchased these secondhand, but they can be difficult to find.  I prefer the BabyGap brand, as they seem to be thicker and more durable.  These work beautifully by themselves for chilly autumn or spring days, but also are wonderful as the insulation part of her snow gear on winter days when paired with the rainsuit.

On the coldest days, I layer all of these items together to keep N toasty warm.

Smaller Winter Accessories:

IMG_1514

  • Smartwool socks – When it comes to socks, I really feel that Smartwool can’t be beat.  (I will say I haven’t heard wonderful things about the fit of their baby socks, though.)  The wool wicks away sweat and keeps my daughter’s toes toasty warm.  We can actually wear ours two to four days in a row before washing.  (I know, it sounds gross, but wool doesn’t need to be washed as often as other fibers and often just needs a good airing between wearings.)
  • Balaclava – To prevent N’s hat from always falling off and her scarf from getting in the way, we got rid of both and simply purchased a balaclava.  It keeps her neck warm and the hat portion always stays over her ears.  I chose one that is lighter so that it will still work well in the spring and autumn, and in the winter we simply put the hoods of her winter coat and rainsuit up for added warmth.
  • Mittens – a good pair of waterproof mittens will help to keep little fingers warm in the winter and dry when out in the autumn and spring rain.  While I like the pair we have, this pair is on my wish list because of it’s added warmth (at the glowing recommendation of a Wisconsin family member).
  • Gloves – I had the hardest time finding tiny gloves for my N’s three-year-old hands.  These are a bit big, but they work for those cool days that aren’t absolutely freezing.  Any recommendations for itty-bitty gloves?
  • Boots – The boots pictured were purchased secondhand.  They do the job as long as they are paired with Smartwool socks.  The only downside to them (specific to our situation) is that they don’t accommodate N’s AFO’s (orthotics) as the opening is not wide enough.  If you have recommendations of warm boots with wide openings to accomodate AFO’s I’d love to hear them!

And that’s how we keep N warm and dry on winter days!  What about you?  How do you keep your children warm on the coldest days?  What are your winter must haves?

This post contains affiliate links at no cost to you.

The Death of a Pet

This past week, we found ourselves having to make the sudden decision to euthanize our eldest dog, Kira.  At just shy of 12 years old, she had been showing some signs of her age, but we expected to have a few more years with her.  However, on Christmas Eve, shortly before N’s bedtime, Kira suffered a seizure which paralyzed her back legs and placed immense pressure on her brain.  Within an hour, it was clear to us that it would be time to say goodbye.

N has a history which makes pain and loss particularly difficult for her to process and cope with.  We knew that this situation, and the suddenness of it, had the potential to cause her a great deal of anxiety and fear.  However, we discovered that our Montessori-based parenting philosophy served us well, as it so often does in the midst of difficult circumstances.

Here are a few things we decided in order to respect N as a person as well as her unique, emotional needs:

  • We would use real, accurate language about what happened.  While is was tempting to tell her that Kira got “sick”, would “go to sleep”, or that a “doctor” would take care of Kira, we felt that these generalizations could cause more anxiety in the future about sickness, sleeping, and doctors.  Instead, we explained that Kira had a seizure which damaged her brain and that the muscles in her back legs, neck, and eyes no longer worked.  She would not be able to eat, walk, or go into the back yard to pee and poop.  We explained that when an animal’s brain does not work correctly, they cannot live.
  • We would offer her choices about how she would like to say goodbye.  We told her that she could gently hug Kira, pet her, give her a pillow, or simply wave.  She chose to hug her and then wave.
  • We let N help to make choices about what to do with Kira’s bed, bowl, leash, and collar the next day.  N is not yet ready to put away Kira’s bed, as it’s always been in view in the same spot and her sense of order is still very strong.  And that’s ok.
  • We would let her talk about Kira, what happened, and any feelings when and for as long as she wished.  So far, though, she has not talked about how she feels, which isn’t particularly unusual for N.  We have, however, noticed her incorporate Kira’s name and death story into her pretend play.  This could be disturbing to some, but we feel that it is her way of working through what happened.
  • We chose not to let N see the body, nor be a part of the burial.  We felt that, developmentally, this was not the right choice for her.  We did explain what we would do with Kira’s body, however.

For more ideas and a list of books to help children cope with the loss of a pet, visit The Kavanaugh Report.

IMG_2621 3

As uncomfortable as death and loss can be, our children are looking to us to model how to cope in both genuine and healthy ways with these situations.  And, like any other learning experience, they need time and opportunity to build their coping skills.

12 Days of Christmas – Our Advent

This year, we are consciously participating in advent preparations.  We didn’t do a lot with Christmas the first two years after N joined our family.  All of the hustle and bustle of the season was simply too much for her as she made all of the adjustments to a new family, new environment, and new country.  Those years we chose to set up a simple Christmas tree, stockings, and gift her with only three presents.  Otherwise, we listened to a little Christmas music and let the season drift by peacefully.

This year, we are choosing to do 12 days of Christmas as the holiday approaches.  When preparing for these days, we tried to keep a few things in mind.  We wanted to respect bedtime, our minimalist ideals, and our low-schedule lifestyle.  (Hence, 12 days rather than 24.)  We wanted to ensure that time together and making simple sensory memories were the highlights.  And we wanted to focus on benefiting others.

In an attempt to be transparent, I had every intention of putting up little envelopes or bags with the activities written on a card inside so that N could open one each day as we “counted down” to Christmas. But, the more I thought about it, the more I realized that doing so would be fulfilling my desire to pack everything wonderful into this Christmas season rather than her need to have special but low key experiences.  So, while we are hoping to do one activity each day, we aren’t pushing it at all and instead watching her cues to see if she is ready to do something on any given day or just needs a day of normalcy and relaxation.

IMG_1435

Here are the activities we have as choices.  You’ll see more than 12 in case one doesn’t work out and to give us flexibility in what might work for N on any given day.

  1. String cranberries and popcorn, and dry oranges for the tree. (This has been one of N’s favorites, as she’s asked to string cranberries several days in a row now.)
  2. Go see a live nativity.
  3. Make the birds a treat.
  4. Go see Christmas lights.
  5. Make cards to send to friends and family. (And post them with Snowy Day stamps!)
  6. Go for a Christmas Eve nature walk.
  7. Make clay Christmas ornaments to give to others.
  8. Make almond meal pancake people for breakfast.  (Nutritious and N can have them!)
  9. Make soup and take some to others.
  10. Family game night. (First Orchard and Match a Pair of Birds are the favorites around here, though I’m eyeing up Shopping List as well.)
  11. Fill a shoebox to send to a child. (Operation Christmas Child accepts boxes year round.)
  12. Make cookies.  (This recipe is awesome and doesn’t include any sugar, molasses, or syrup.  We replace the dates with pumpkin so N can eat them, but if you make them with the dates, they are the yummiest “healthy” cookie I’ve ever tasted!)
  13. Make beeswax candles.
  14. Go out to breakfast.
  15. Go on a coffee date.  (Coffee for Daddy and me, and a frothy, warm almond milk for N.)

Throughout the year, we also collected Christmas (and a few winter) books.  We wrapped them up and N opens one each day to read in preparation for Christmas.  Most of them will be used again next year, though a few will have to be switched out for books that more closely match N’s developmental stage.  I managed to set them all out on N’s bookshelves and snap a photo before wrapping them up without N seeing.

IMG_1276

Top row:

Room for a Little One | A Child is Born (no longer in print; consider searching eBay)| Winter is the Warmest Season | The NativityChristmas in the Big Woods | Under the Christmas Tree (also no longer in print; search eBay)| Christmas in the Manger

Bottom Row:

An African Christmas Cloth | Winter Walk | The Birds of Bethlehem | Walk this World at Christmastime

We love that several of these books are representative of N, though we are particularly fond of Walk this World at Christmastime for exposing N to various people and traditions around the world and An African Christmas Cloth (set in South Africa) because of our family’s ties there.

Between these books and the activities above, we hope to keep Christmas simple for N, yet give her fond memories to look back on and traditions to look forward to.

IMG_1441

What activities do you do with your children?  Any delightful ones that we should consider adding next year?

This post contains affiliate links at no cost to you.

Children and the Outdoors

“When children come into contact with nature, they reveal their strength.” — Maria Montessori

IMG_0700

Recently, I’ve been doing a lot of reading about the benefits of getting children outdoors each and every day for extended periods of time, rain (or snow) or shine.  My daughter has some sensory integration challenges that make for some difficult parenting situations.  However, over the summer, I had been taking note that these difficult situations were few and far between when we spent time outside.  I also noticed a great deal more imaginative play than I ever saw when we were indoors.  And it dawned on me… nature must be good for children’s growth, self-regulation, and overall development!

I admit, it feels a bit like a silly epiphany.  After all, I’m a nature person at heart, and growing up on a rural dairy farm offered me all of the sensory, outdoor experiences a child could ever want or need.  I grew up on nature.  So, I felt rather sheepish to be consciously realizing something so basic.  But, nevertheless, there it was.  Now I just needed to act on it.  We don’t live on a farm like I did as a child.  Just a house on a dead-end lane in town.  I can’t offer my daughter the daily interactions with wet-nosed, warm, huffing cattle or the fort-building, exploring adventures in the backyard creek as the seasons change.  But I’ve told myself that the vast majority of children don’t grow up on farms, and plenty of them still spend long hours outside playing.

Thus, the challenge of 365 Days of Outdoor Play began.

IMG_1083

On the first day of November, I began taking N outside every day for at least 2 hours.  We do this rain, shine, snow, or cold.  I admit that it has yet to get terribly cold here (we just had our first snow today), and getting outside for that amount of time hasn’t generally been a challenge.  I do expect that we won’t get outside for that amount of time every day, either due to illness or back to back therapy/medical appointments, but it’s something to reach for.

Over the past month, I reached out to the Instagram community to ask about recommendations for clothing to aid us in our challenge and began reading any article and book I could get my hands on about the benefits of outdoor play for children.  I received some wonderful tips on clothing for children (which I plan to share in a later post) and a lot of encouragement.  I’ve also been reading Balanced and Barefoot (I highly recommend this book and find it Montessori compatible) and am about to start How to Raise a Wild Child before moving on to There’s No Such Thing As Bad Weather.

Below is some of the information I’ve found striking from Balanced and Barefoot:

  • Ideally, kids of all ages should get at least three hours of free play outdoors a day.  The book further breaks it down to say that children ages 1-5 would benefit from 5-8 hours a day, ages 5-13 would benefit from 4-5 hours, and adolescents would benefit from 3-4 hours a day.  (Clearly my goal of two hours doesn’t reach what’s recommended, but I’ll start where I can!)
  • The outdoors offers a balanced sensory experience, aiding children in developing proper sensory integration including the vestibular and proprioceptive senses.
  • In child-driven play, children will naturally take risks.  Allowing your children to take risks (within reason) will foster healthy development and confidence, and enable them to accurately assess risks as adults.
  • According to the author, it takes children an average of forty-five minutes to make their play choices and settle into deep play.  (This was contrasted with the twenty-minute recesses common at many schools today.)
  • Don’t wait until your baby is an older toddler to get them outside to play.  Let them explore and take risks as they are able.  This will help their “sensory and motor systems to thrive, laying a strong foundation for later life challenges and academic learning.”

I know that this book has given me a few ideas for encouraging more independent outdoor play.  And I certainly don’t need any more research to encourage me to make the effort to get outside every day!  In fact, my biggest obstacle right now is to make sure that I’m properly dressed for extended time outside in all types of weather.  (Recommendations, anyone?)

What are your favorite ways to get outside and enjoy nature?  I’d love to hear what you do, especially if you live in a more populated area!

This post contains affiliate links at no cost to you.

Grocery Shopping with Young Children

A few months ago, we stopped at a grocery store where they offered child-sized carts.  Of course, this was quite an exciting experience for N.  Now, every time we stop at a grocery store, as opposed to market where we do the majority of our weekly shopping, N asks if there are “little shopping carts”.  Unfortunately, the grocery store that we generally use doesn’t offer them and my answer has not been what she hopes to hear.  Until last week.

We made a quick pitstop at the grocery store for a forgotten item and saw a young boy pushing around a red, child-sized cart.  I wasted no time in asking where they were located and then promptly retrieved one to use… even though we were only purchasing one item.  It didn’t matter.  N was absolutely delighted with this new way to participate in the grocery shopping experience.

A few days ago, we returned for some planned items to finish up the grocery shopping for the week.  N carried the list, chose her two snacks from the bulk aisle, and helped check out and bag the items.  She returned to the car with a contented air about her.  As we left the parking lot, she melted my heart, saying “Thanks for going to the grocery store with you, Mommy.”  (Thanking someone for something is the one place she still mixes up her pronouns.)

I love grocery shopping with my child.  Whether it’s at market or at a supermarket, we generally have a wonderful learning experience.  Here are some tips for making grocery shopping with your young child a successful learning experience.

IMG_0803

  • Prepare ahead of time.  As often as possible, have a pre-set day and time that you head out to the store.  This helps to develop routine as your children know what to expect.  Choose a time when your child is not hungry nor tired.  Budget enough time that you don’t feel rushed and can allow your child to take in this rich sensory experience.
  • Make a list.  Try to write your list in front of your child.  If you want your child to write, modeling the skill you find important is the best way to get them interested.  (I also try to offer list paper for N to write on from time to time.)  A list will also create a sense of order as you read off what needs to be retrieved next while shopping (and limit impulse buys!).

IMG_0806

  • Provide child-sized materials.  There aren’t really many materials you need to go grocery shopping, but, depending on how involved you’d like your child to be, there are a few you could consider.  We offer N a wallet (purchased secondhand) with a member rewards card in it to scan at the checkout counter as well as her own cloth grocery bag to carry a few items in.  Of course, we also have access to child-sized carts now.  If your store doesn’t have them, you could always ask management if that’s something they would consider.  Before, we always just let N help to push the small adult-sized ones.
  • Let them retrieve items.  Retrieving items that they can reach is a fantastic opportunity for children to refine their movements.  It’s generally also a wonderful gross motor exercise.  Yes, they may drop items (N dropped a few potatoes on this outing), but that’s part of the learning experience.  Messes and clean-up happens in grocery stores.  In addition, it instills in children the idea that you trust them with something so vital to your life and that they are a valued, working member of your family.

IMG_0808

  • Provide them with choice.  To limit the number of times I am asked to purchase off-list items, I provide N with a choice of two items from the bulk bins when we do our routine shopping.  We’ve discussed ahead of time which items are appropriate choices for her.  If your child is younger, you may wish to show them two, preselected items and let them choose one to eat as a snack in the car or upon arriving back at home.

IMG_0824

  • Talk about your experience.  We do a lot of stopping and talking during our grocery shopping.  We talk about what produce we see and what we smell.  We discuss the shapes and letters on signs and labels.  This is a banquet of a language experience.  Take advantage of it!
  • Extend the learning.  Look for books on grocery shopping or visiting market.  This one by Anne Rockwell is a current favorite of one of N’s friends.  While I haven’t played it myself, I’ve heard that many families really enjoy the game, Shopping List. It seems like a fun game to extend the grocery shopping experience.

Those are a few suggestions for making the most of your shopping experience with children.  But don’t let it stop there!  Invite your children to help you put your groceries away.  Invite them to cook, taste and eat what you’ve purchased.  The cycle of purchasing (or producing), preparing, and partaking in the food experience is practical life at it’s finest.

 

 

Montessori on a Budget – Part 2

Last time, in Part 1 of this series, I shared some ideas for implementing Montessori in your home that cost nothing more than your time and commitment.  If you missed that post, you can read it here.  While writing that post, I sometimes felt like I was misleading readers by titling the post “Montessori on a Budget” because, really, most people want to know how to afford the materials that they see being utilized in Montessori homes.  I get it.  I’ve been there.  But if there is one thing I wish I would’ve learned earlier, it’s that Montessori is less about materials and more about a way of living.  I think Brittany Peters summed it up best with an Instagram post, saying “Please do not consider Montessori in the home as a list of to-buys but instead a list of to-be’s.”  And if you’re still really wanting to know how to find affordable materials, then I regret to inform you that you’ll have to wait until Part 3 of this series. 😉

Here, in Part 2, I’d like to focus on experiences for your child.  As a minimalist, I realize I may be a bit biased towards prioritizing experiences over materials because experiences don’t clutter my home.  However, I recognize that experiences also provide my daughter with unique sensory input, language and vocabulary opportunities, and cultural education, which is valued in Montessori homes and schools alike.

Experiences encompass a wide range of time commitments, planning, and cost.  However, for the purposes of this post, I will focus on experiences that I’ve found affordable for my household.

Here are the top five experiences I’ve shared with my daughter this year so far:

  1.  Market – This is a sensory treat for sure!  N gets to see so many different types of food, she observes the exchange of money for goods, and often chooses a healthy treat for us to prepare together once we return home.  Our only expense is the food itself, which we would need to budget for anyway.

IMG_0328

  1. Library – This is an excellent resource to take advantage of if you have one close by.  Of course, the books are the reason we go, but the experience itself is worthwhile.  N experiences the whole process of checking out books, keeping track of them at home and returning them (though she can’t quite reach that book drop yet!).  She even has her own library card, of which is is quite proud.  This experience is absolutely free, assuming you don’t wrack up any overdue fees.

IMG_0335

  1. Touch-A-Truck – N LOVES vehicles of all kinds, so this was a wonderful experience for her.  From my understanding, it’s generally organized by the community or a local school and costs only a few dollars to get in.  I had never heard of them before, until Amy at Midwest Montessori mentioned taking her children to one.  N was able to explore farm machinery, construction equipment, a school bus, and community rescue vehicles.  A simple Google search for my area turned up a few dates and places for us to choose from.
  2. Parks/Playgrounds – these are wonderful gross motor outlets since we don’t have a lot of gross motor equipment in our home.  But N also has the opportunity to get outside, observe other people, get dirty, and explore.  And they are free.  🙂

IMG_0298

  1. Community garden – we spent $35 for a community garden seasonal plot this year, started all of our plants from seed and easily recouped our costs in the food we harvested.  Our plot provided N with real work to involve herself in as a way to contribute to our household.  She genuinely enjoyed cutting flowers for flower arranging, shelling peas, pulling weeds and adding mulch.  It was one of the outings she requested most, even on days we didn’t plan to visit our plot.

Other ideas that we have experienced or are planning in the near future:

  • Local Fairs – this could include county/farm type fairs as well as cultural and art fairs.
  • Camping – we do tent camping, making things quite inexpensive.  Often tents can be borrowed from friends or family if you don’t have one.
  • Zoo – check around your area for smaller, local zoos in addition to the larger, more well-known ones.  The Baltimore Zoo, Philadelphia Zoo, and National Zoo in Washington DC are all accessible to us, but we also find just as much enjoyment in the smaller area zoos such as ZooAmerica and Lake Tobias Wildlife Park.

IMG_0470

  • Theatre – depending on your child, they may enjoy high school and university programs, plays and concerts.
  • Nature Center – many state or national parks have nature centers geared toward children.  Often these nature centers also have themed days with hands-on experiences for children.
  • Local Attractions – some of these might be open to the general public and some might not be.  Our local veterinary clinic holds kid-oriented Saturday programs once a month where kids can experience something animal related.  We have gotten to know a bird rehabilitator who specializes in birds of prey.  We visit her facility routinely to get a look at and help care for birds that many people don’t get to see up close and personal.  In the photo below, since N loves vehicles and machinery, we took her to an event to watch a large apple be placed on top of a building.  Start asking around about child-friendly experiences.  You might be surprised at what you discover.

IMG_0390

  • Aquarium – this is a fantastic experience for children and adults alike.  Depending on your child’s tolerance level for stimulation, I would suggest going on a weekday shortly after school starts.  You’ll miss both the summer rush and the school field trips.
  • Pet Store – what’s not to love!  It’s a mini zoo that’s completely free!  (As long as you don’t walk out with a new pet!)

I realize that not all of these experiences are exactly inexpensive.  For us, visiting the zoo was the most expensive outing.  There are, however, options for lessening the cost of some of the above ideas if you are willing to be flexible or have the time to do your research.  Often, tickets to zoos, local attractions, theaters, and fairs can be purchased for a discounted price using memberships or subscriptions you already hold.  We’ve used AAA membership and our grocery store bonus card to get discounted tickets to our local fairs and attractions, as well as to a zoo and nearby aquarium.  Some experiences offer specials if you subscribe to their Facebook page.  My favorite way to make many of these affordable, however, is to find out when a particular venue is offering a family day.  We have visited a zoo, local attraction, and an aquarium, all for no cost, using this option.  The downside to this money-saving method, though, is that these days are often offered only in the off-season (i.e. winter), sometimes making the weather challenging, and can be very crowded as many other families take advantage of the cost savings as well.

One more option to consider for making experiences affordable is to simply ask for them to be given as gifts.  We have family members that genuinely enjoy giving gifts but, given our minimalist lifestyle, are somewhat limited in this.  Providing a list of experiences they can purchase tickets for or memberships to, and even join us as they are experienced, is a nice compromise for all.

What other money-saving tips do you have for experiences?  Are there other experiences your children enjoy that you find easy on the budget?  I’d love to hear about them!

 

 

Bedtime Books

{This post contains affiliate links, which means I receive a small percentage if you purchase an item through my link.  The fees I receive through these links go directly towards my daughter’s home education or our adoption expenses.}

We’ve read bedtime books to N since the day we met her.  We started out with the classic Goodnight Moon and ensured that books were part of her bedtime routine each evening.  It wasn’t long until she could recite entire books.  In fact, it wasn’t unusual for her to bring a bedtime book over to our room in the morning to plop down and “read” to herself while she was still waking up.

As I was perusing our books this evening, I thought I would share our top 5 favorites over the past year.

Time for Bed is a classic.  The illustrations are lovely, and the narration has a calming, lilting quality to it.  I particularly enjoy the rhyme, as it makes it easy for even young children to “fill in the blank” if given the opportunity to help read.

img_0044.jpg

I Would Tuck You In is a fun mix of scientific trivia and comforting reassurance in a parent’s love.  We discovered this book at our local nature center’s library and had to purchase a copy for ourselves.

img_0045.jpg

I’ve mentioned A South African Night before, but I can’t help but add it here as well.  It opens and closes with the routine of people in Johannesburg, but gives an account of animal activity in Kruger National Park at night.

img_0046.jpg

In Going to Sleep on the Farm, a little boy asks his dad how various farm animals go to sleep, before finally falling asleep himself.  N loves the combination of animal sounds, repeating text, and rhyme, as well as talking about the different ways animals sleep.

img_0047.jpg

I Just Want to Say Goodnight is an endearing book about Lala, who just isn’t quite ready to go to bed and procrastinates by saying “goodnight” to everything from the dog to the marching ants to a rock.

img_0048.jpg

While these are our favorites, I’d love to add to our bedtime collection!  What are your bedtime favorites?  Any recommendations for the 3-4 year old range?

 

Puzzle Progression

{This post contains affiliate links, which means I receive a small percentage if you purchase an item through my link.  The fees I receive through these links go directly towards my daughter’s home education or our adoption expenses.}

Right off the bat, I want to say that if you haven’t yet read Nicole’s posts on the Evolution of Puzzles at The Kavanaugh Report, you should head off and do that!  She clearly lays out how her daughter progressed through puzzles and has many links to puzzles if you’re looking into purchasing some.  In addition, she also outlines what she looks for in a puzzle for her home, which is quite similar to what we look for in puzzles for N.

I can remember reading these posts a year ago with some envy.  No matter which puzzles I introduced to N, I couldn’t seem to get her truly interested.  At first, I thought that perhaps the puzzles weren’t interesting because I wasn’t offering puzzles that hit her developmental level.  But, after a time, I resigned myself to the fact that she just wasn’t interested.  Which was ok.  Follow the child, right?  I still offered puzzles routinely, but they generally would receive only the initial exploratory use and then be left on the shelves, largely unused, until I removed them.

Suddenly, just over a month ago, that changed.  As I was going through our materials in storage, deciding which to purge and which to put into deep storage for a younger child, N noticed a 12-piece vehicle jigsaw I had picked up secondhand and asked to work on it.  I consented, figuring that she would disassemble it and then lose interest.  That wasn’t the case.  She worked intently, with very little assistance, until it was completed.  And then proceeded to complete it three more times!  It was the start of a very intense interest that I’ve struggled to keep up with while attempting to balance our minimalist values.

When I first introduced puzzles to N around the age of 2 (she joined our family around 20 months of age), I offered simple shape and size puzzles to ensure any developmental gaps would be filled and also to help her feel a sense of success.  It didn’t take her long to master these, but I’m glad I offered them, nonetheless.  We then quickly moved onto a shape sorter and knobbed puzzles with pictures and more complex outlines.  These were more difficult for her, as it took some time for her to learn to refine her movements so that the pieces were turned just exactly right.

IMG_0602

Pictured: 1) Montessori Insets Shape Puzzle Set     2)  Animal Knobbed Puzzle    3)  Shape Sorter

As N mastered turning the larger knobbed pieces correctly, I introduced smaller knobbed puzzles with pictures under the pieces.  (Approximately at 26 months.)  These presented a new challenge for N.  Since there were more pieces to match, she often would try to match anything with a similar color.  She also needed to refine her pincer grasp.  As these puzzles were something she worked on in therapy in a rather non-Montessori fashion, she did not enjoy working with them at home.  I occasionally set these puzzles out, but N found them more intriguing for language development than anything.  In my experience, these puzzles are not difficult to find affordably in secondhand stores.

IMG_0604

img_0603.jpg

Pictured:   1) Farm Peg Puzzle    2)  Tool Peg Puzzle (No longer available for purchase.  We found ours on eBay.)

Around this same time, I introduced two-piece jigsaw puzzles.  These required N to coordinate both hands together.  Out of all of the puzzles I presented up to this point, these piqued N’s interest the most.  While the pictures aren’t as realistic as I’d like, I found it quite difficult to find two-piece jigsaws in general.  (If you have any recommendations, please pass them along!)

IMG_0610  IMG_0609

Pictured:  1)  Heads and Tails 2-Piece Jigsaws    2)  Things that Go 2-Piece Jigsaws

After N mastered the two-piece jigsaws and the small knobbed puzzles with pictures under the pieces around 30 months, I introduced two different types of puzzles to see where her interest led.  I first introduced tiny knobbed puzzles where the picture under the piece did not match the piece exactly to move her toward focusing on the shape of the piece rather than just the picture.  N enjoyed these to some extent, but mostly because she likes all things vehicle-related so we talked about the vehicles in the puzzle.  I then tried jigsaws with 3-6 pieces, which were never a hit, perhaps because they were not realistic enough or perhaps because they were a bit busy, visually (not pictured).  Very shortly after this, I also introduced puzzles with no pictures under the pieces.  The puzzles with only four pieces to place were far too easy and should have been introduced earlier.  She had absolutely no interest in these.  The puzzles where several pieces worked together to make one picture (shown in the next section) frustrated her because they slid around and there was no clear place for each one.  I set them aside for later.  The homemade width puzzle was likely the closest to her ability level at this time, as it held her attention the longest.  However, this is the also the point at which N’s interest in puzzles declined even further and her ability to complete them appeared to plateau.

IMG_0608

img_0605.jpg

Pictured:    1)  Hape Emergency Peg Puzzle  (alternative)    2)  Vintage Transportation Puzzle (alternative fruit puzzle)    3)  Vintage Tea Set Puzzle (alternative vegetable puzzle) eBay is a fantastic place to look for these vintage puzzles using the search terms “Judy Instructo Puzzle”.  The prices are generally reasonable, but the shipping can be expensive.  4)  Narrow-to-Wide Homemade Puzzle (Etsy alternative)

Like I said, just over a month ago, all of that changed.  She started with a 12-piece jigsaw and has quickly progressed to 24-piece jigsaws over the course of five weeks.  We really like T.S. Shure puzzles for their realistic pictures, but also find that some Melissa and Doug puzzles are not too “cartoony” for our taste.   Just in time for a recent trip, we discovered a few board book type puzzle books with real photos that we cut the pages out of to use on the plane.  They are lightweight and can easily slide into N’s small backpack, making them perfect for travel .  I also reintroduced the picture puzzles, which are now a touch too easy for her.  She masters one in the course of a day or two, repeating and repeating it until she can complete one in less than two minutes.  We particularly like Judy Instructo puzzles, but nearly all of those are vintage and have to be purchased via eBay or found secondhand.  The Beleduc layered body puzzle provides a unique challenge, but these can be expensive, unless you find them secondhand.

IMG_0611

img_0612.jpg

img_06171.jpg

Pictured:    1)  12-Piece Construction Jigsaw     2)  Jigsaw Board Book Pages (similar 6-piece version)    3)  T.S. Shure Ocean Life Set of 4      4)  Vintage Judy Instructo Frog Puzzle      5)  Vintage Judy Instructo Penguin Puzzle    6)  Beleduc Boy Layered Body Puzzle 

Following the child is an amazing thing.  N’s current interest in and ability to complete puzzles was totally self-initiated.  I had made up my mind that N just wasn’t a puzzle person.  It’s a good lesson in ensuring that I don’t box her in or label her.  She forms her own identity.

 

Getting Dressed at 3 Years Old

Independence.  It’s one of the cornerstones or Montessori.  And letting your child be involved in getting dressed each day is one of the simplest ways to foster independence in the home.  Even babies can help choose their outfit for the day when given a choice between two pre-selected options.  And it’s fascinating to see preferences emerge in children so young.  (And, as a side note, it can also be informative as to which clothing your child finds comfortable and which gets passed over routinely.  It’s how I discovered some of N’s clothing restricted leg movement.  She would only choose it if everything else was in the laundry.)

We began involving N in the dressing routine a year ago.  Below is a (very dark and poor quality) photo of N’s attempt at independent dressing a few months after we began.  Despite having two legs in one hole and an arm out the neck hole of her tank top, she’s quite pleased.  I sincerely wish we had started much, much earlier.  But, alas, what you don’t know, you don’t know.  Full disclosure: We actually began, not because of a desire for her to exercise independence, but because of toilet learning.  We wanted her to be able to push down her shorts and underwear when the time came.  At the time, we didn’t understand the importance nor process of independence in children.  As our understanding grew and developed, we implemented small changes accordingly.  Now, a year later, N can get dressed almost independently.  We’ve learned quite a few little things along the way that helped to make the process less frustrating for N.  Some were through trial and error.  Other tips we found through great blog posts.  You can read some great tips here and here.  Our setup is far from ideal, but we found ways to work with what we had.  Here’s how dressing at 3 years old looked in our home this morning.

IMG_3923 3

N chooses her underwear and hands them to me.  At this point, I still gather one leg hole and the waist together for her so that she gets started correctly.  She uses a small dressing chair that I picked up at a consignment sale to sit in while she put on her underwear and pants or shorts.  In the beginning, we used a small stool that my husband had made until I found the chair.  Really, anything that your child can remain seated on with their feet firmly on the floor will work.

FullSizeRender 13

Then she chooses her next item of clothing.  Often she wants to choose her socks next, but this morning it was her shirt.  N has access to the bottom three drawers of the dresser as well as a small closet for jackets and dresses (not pictured).  Out-of-season clothing and sheets for the bed are stored in the top two drawers.  She is able to handle having all of her in-season clothing to choose from at this age, especially since we keep her clothing to a minimum.  She has approximately 4 long-sleeved shirts, three tank tops, three t-shirts, 5 jeans/pants, 5 shorts, two jackets, and three dresses.  All of this is available at the moment since we are having irregular early-summer weather.  We simply discuss how warm or cold it is supposed to be for the day, enabling her to choose accordingly.  For younger children, you may want to just set out two outfits for them to choose from, or three tops and three bottoms for them to mix and match at will.

I do gather her shirt into a loop for her, though I can tell that she is nearly ready to begin attempting to do the whole process herself.  We’ve found that it’s best to provide clothing for N that is somewhat loose or has a generous amount of give (but isn’t too spandex-y) to make her attempts at dressing and undressing more successful.  Large neck holes are important for us, as well as looseness in the armpit area.

IMG_6333

  Socks were next this morning.  This was the part of dressing that took the longest for N to be capable of.  It took a lot of trial and error for us to find what worked for her.  We tried having her put them on in the dressing chair, but found (due to her challenges related to strength and balance) that bringing her foot up that high while she tried to focus on opening the sock and inserting her foot was too much all at once.  So we moved to the floor.  We also had to figure out the best way for her to get the sock open wide enough for her foot.  While she now does what I would call the typical “thumbs-in-fingers-out pinch” to open the sock, at first that was pretty difficult for her.  We discovered that if we helped her to turn her hands outward so that her four fingers on each hand were inside the sock and pushing it open, that worked to get the sock open wide enough.  As she practiced each day, she didn’t need the extra-wide hole to aim her foot at, and she discovered how to coordinate foot movements with hand movements to be successful.  This took a long, long, l.o.n.g. time.  She needed plenty of time to practice.  At this point, putting the socks on is the easy part, and I’ve noticed she is working at keeping them straight so that the heel doesn’t end up on top.

IMG_6341           IMG_6342

Next were the shorts.  I no longer hand them to her, but give a gentle reminder to put her hands on both sides of the button or bow.  She sometimes struggles to get everything centered and ends up with both legs in one hole, but that’s part of the process.  She just comments on the situation, takes them back off and tries again.  Over time, I’ve discovered that leggings are not the best idea for N as they are too stretchy and she just gets stuck, tangled up, or things end up inside out when she tries to readjust.  We also prefer that bottoms do have a bow or a button to serve as an indicator for the front, but try to find buttons that are not-functioning as N is not ready to button her own pants yet.

IMG_6350

And sometimes she is still distracted by something during the dressing process.  This morning, her own belly button was the distraction.  We allow for these distractions as part of the process.  Often the distractions have to do with her own body parts, which provide fantastic opportunities to discuss function and proper terminology naturally and without shame.

IMG_6354

After seeing the progress of one year, I’m excited to watch her independence in this area unfold over the next year.  I anticipate button and zipper closures will be something she’s interested in mastering, but look forward to following her lead!

IMG_6355

Montessori on a Budget Series – Part 1

When we began our Montessori journey, I made a common mistake.  I confused the Montessori method with materials.  I saw children joyfully working with lovely toys and tools that developed their focus and refined their movements.  Wanting desperately to have the beautiful items I saw in Instagram feeds and on blogs for my daughter, I went on a shopping spree.  I purchased items from Amazon and Ebay, from Home Goods and Target, from thrift stores and yard sales.  Thankfully, my aspiring minimalist side urged me to take a closer look at why I was purchasing “stuff”.  I’ve been working toward minimalism long enough to realize that when I buy a whole bunch of material items, there’s usually a deeper issue I’m attempting to control.  Yes, these materials were beautiful.  No, there’s nothing wrong with purchasing items for your children.  The prepared environment is, in fact, an important piece of the Montessori method.  Maria Montessori designed many materials to be beautiful and attractive.  Families fall all over the spectrum with what materials they choose to buy for their children.  For us, we are on a tight budget and try to keep our material items to a minimum.  And what I really wanted for my daughter was the joy, focus, and satisfaction I saw in the children featured on Montessori-related social media.  Thankfully, the Montessori method is so much more than materials.  In fact, some of the most important aspects of the method aren’t about materials at all!

Here are 5 ways you can implement Montessori in the home that don’t require acquiring materials:

Foster a sense of order in your home.  Children, particularly children under the age of five, crave order.  This includes both order in routines to anchor the day and order regarding placement of materials in your home.  It can be difficult to keep to a routine for so many reasons.  For us, medical appointments, unforeseen errands, and a side business cause more shifts in routine than we would like.  We have decided to anchor N’s routine around mealtimes and sleeping.  Her morning routine is always the same (snuggles, toilet, making her bed, lotion, dressing, preparing breakfast… in that order) and never rushed, which means we take care to make appointments accordingly.  Sometimes she flies through the routine, sometimes it moves quite slowly.  Lunchtime is another anchor point in our routine.  She and I wash our hands, prepare our lunch together, pray, and then eat together.  Lunchtime is followed by a period of reading.  Supper and bedtime anchor the last portion of our day.  Again, the routine is always the same, though the parent helping with the routine may change.  We do our utmost to honor these routines, ensuring that N is not rushed and nothing is skipped for the sake of “time”.  Find ways to incorporate routine and rhythm into your child’s day.

It’s been far easier for us to maintain order of the material items in our home.  Well, it’s only been easier after we purged and simplified our belongings.  If reducing the amount of material items you own isn’t an option, do your best to maintain order in the areas that belong to your child.  If your child has a lot of toys and materials, consider rotating those materials.  Less materials out at once will make it easier for both you and your child to know where to return those materials to.  Have a designated place for each material, and help your child to return items until they can do so independently.  It doesn’t have to be a big deal.  Modeling can work wonders.  In the photo below, N had observed that we always placed the bin of flower arranging debris outside after the activity was over.  Today, she simply picked it up, opened the door and put it outside, all the while repeating “This need to go outside” to herself.  External order fosters a sense of internal order, not only for the child but for the caregiver as well.

FullSizeRender 12

Involve your child in the daily household activities.  In our home, we clean, cook, do laundry, grocery shop, care for pets, and complete outside chores together.  Yes, it’s ideal to have child-sized tools for your child to use, but the real merit lies in meeting the child’s inner desire to do real work and be a valued member of the household.  For me, it can be a challenge to involve N in the household chores because it means letting go of control over time and messes.  I’ve often had to repeat to myself the Dr. John Trainer quote “Children are not a distraction from more important work.  They are the most important work” as a reminder of my role as a parent.  When I’m tempted to leave N out of an activity because I don’t want a mess, I’ve found it helpful as well to step back and ask myself if the cleanliness of my house is more important than the learning experience of my daughter.  Will it matter in a month if she pulled the wrong plant in the garden?  Will I even care in a day if she drug my freshly washed shirt through the yard to hang it on the clothesline?  Will it hurt anything at all if the water gets spilled on the floor instead of poured in the potted plant?  Or will all of these experiences enhance her opportunities to learn if handled as just that… opportunities to learn?  Learning to complete household tasks with joy will serve your child well for the entirety of their life.

FullSizeRender 10

Learn to observe your child.  I had always thought of myself as a pretty observant person.  But after completing an observation assignment for the Montessori Toddler E-Course I was taking, I realized I wasn’t fully observing.  I was seeing expression of emotions and shutting that expression down because I was uncomfortable.  I was seeing expression of developmental needs and redirecting because I didn’t see materials being used the way I expected.  “There is only one basis for observation: the children must be free to express themselves and thus reveal those needs and attitudes which would otherwise remain hidden or repressed in an environment that did not permit them to act spontaneously.”  (Maria Montessori, The Discovery of the Child) Stepping back and observing has been one of the most difficult aspects of implementing Montessori in my home that I’ve had to learn.  But it’s also been the most rewarding, allowing me to truly “follow the child”.  Because of careful observation, I’ve been able to introduce sound games at the right time, prepare activities that pique her interest, offer opportunities to kitchen independence as she’s become ready, and resisted pressuring her to move forward developmentally before her own time.  It’s cyclical.  Observing her has allowed me to meet her interests and developmental needs, which frees her to express and reveal further developing needs for me to observe and meet.  And, with a bit of creativity, most of those needs don’t require me to purchase any materials.

Offer opportunities for independence.  Whether it’s offering your baby the opportunity to drink from a cup, providing time for your toddler to attempt to get dressed, or stepping back to allow your child to pack their school lunch, opportunities for independence abound in the home environment.  You will likely have to slow down and be okay with messes, but the rewards are worth it.  (And messes just provide new practical life opportunities on how to clean up!)  Some good starting areas for independence opportunities include dressing, eating, meal preparation, and bathroom-related tasks.  If N wants to give a task a try, I step back and let her, even if I don’t think she’s quite able to complete it yet.  I clearly remember the words “Never help a child with a task at which he feels he can succeed” running through my head on repeat as N attempted to zip her jacket for a full five minutes (which felt like forever) before she finally asked for help.

Sometimes, when it comes to independence, you have to make adjustments.  This is, again, where having child-sized materials or accessible furniture can come in handy, but often you can utilize what you already have in the home.  For example, we don’t have the best clothing set-up for N.  I’d rather have an open wardrobe than a dresser, but because we already had the dresser, we’ve simply moved all of her in-season clothing choices to the bottom three drawers where she can reach them in order to choose her outfit each day.  I’d also love for her to have her own kitchen cabinet/counter combo, but we’ve made do with an emptied out lower drawer and an IKEA table we already owned.  The keys for offering independence are simply to provide time, worry less about mess, and get creative with what you have.

FullSizeRender 11

Protect your child’s concentration.  Like the ideas above, this just takes some awareness and self-control to implement.  Many children struggle with short attention spans and attention deficit disorder for a variety of reasons.  As parents, however, there are countless opportunities throughout the day to protect our children’s concentration and allow them to develop their ability to focus as best as they can.  For starters, cut out or carefully limit the amount of screen time and electronic toys your child has access to, especially if they are babies or toddlers.  The duration of video clips or light/sound effects on children’s programs and toys tends to be amazingly short before a button needs to be pushed again or a new video clip begins.  This conditions children to need a new stimulus quite often.  Some other ideas I’ve heard mentioned for protecting concentration include waiting until an activity is finished to announce mealtime, not interrupting when a child is working even if that work is being done incorrectly (as long as it’s being done safely), and not stepping in to “help” unless the child asks for help.

I, personally, have had to work at protecting N’s concentration in two areas: photos and outings.  Sometimes N will be working diligently on an activity, and I’ll think “Oh, that’s so wonderful!  I need a picture!”  But getting a good photo of some activities would mean getting down into her space and essentially interrupting her work.  So, often I have to be content with just enjoying the moment from where I am and snapping a mental photo.  On outings, there are so many things I want N to see.  And it’s incredibly tempting to force her attention in a certain direction if I think she might miss the sight… like a bear standing on its hind legs on the farm, or a sea turtle swimming by at the aquarium.  But, generally, she’s absolutely enthralled with something else.  Lord willing, there will be many more opportunities for her to see those things in her lifetime.  She is, after all, only three.  Who knows?  If I protect her concentration at this age, perhaps later in life she will be patient and focused enough to sit and wait for those sights.

Next time, I’ll share a few ideas for implementing Montessori on a budget when it comes to outings and experiences.  If you have any ideas, I’d love to hear them!